Noticing what story we are telling ourselves of automatically assuming.

Questioning, broadening, updating, or changing the story.

This is what many people call beliefs.

1. Broaden Your Story To Change Your State

Steps of Skill 4:

1. When feeling distressed ask yourself, “What story am I telling myself that is upsetting me?”
2. Say to yourself the following words,”The story I’m telling myself is ____(Fill in the blank with your story.)
3. Now step back, broaden your view, and ask yourself, “What is missing from my story?” (For example, we usually we imagine ourselves alone to face the worst. What supportive people, divine care, creative possibilities, or helpful next steps may we be leaving out of our story?)
4. Note that this may not fully resolve the upset, and part of us may want to hold onto the distressing story in order to make sure we are prepared for the worst. Additional work can be done to more fully resolve the stress either in a counseling session or using more complex phase 2 skills such as and IFS exercise.